breaking down the nba like craig sager's suits: colorfully

Saturday, September 30, 2006

Introducing Sager's Tailor

As the second writer of this site, I'd like to say thanks for dropping by and introduce myself a bit.

I'm not going to beat around the bush - Sager is my hero. I love to make people laugh and nobody is better at making people laugh than Sager. What makes him great is that it comes so effortlessly. He makes people laugh for hours just by getting dressed. That's God-given talent right there.

First and foremost, it's important to point out that we have no association with at all - though we should because they'll be getting lots of hits from people like me wondering what the hell donning means.

Secondly, if you're a hardcore Knicks fan and you hate reading about your team being made fun of, I'd never come back here again. Isaiah and company are an easy target and if you think we've got any sympathy for them just because they suck, you're wrong.

Thirdly, if you see a coach make a questionable move and wonder what the hell he's thinking, come here and we'll clear it up for you. Wonder why the hell Nelson is going to play Dunleavy as a power forward? That's easy, check out the names that are eligible to enter the 2007 NBA Draft. Starting Dunleavy at the 4 nearly ensures a top draft pick. And unlike 2002, it's a lot harder to end up with a dud like Dunleavy when you have a top 3 pick. So now when Adonal Foyle gets moved to shooting guard you'll know why.

And that's pretty much it. Our purpose is to entertain and look at the NBA through a different, more humorous view than regular blogs. If you want to laugh, come here, if you're feeling down and thinking about downing thirty-five pain killers like wannabe baller T.O, take two minutes to come here first and see if it doesn't change your mood. In fact, you don't even need a reason. Just come back often!

Oh, and just to clear things up, we should be candid about our stance on Rudy Gay. As long as he doesn't go nuts like Reggie Evans, we'll... probably... never make fun of Gay's last name. Rudy can't do anything about his last name being Gay. It's Gay and that's that. But we reserve the right to retract this statement if it's a slow week and Rudy puts his manjunk in someone's face during a dunk.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

The School of Sager

Welcome to Donning Craig Sager's Suit. Your guides, better known as Sager Savant and Sager's Tailor, will help you become more like a man we all strive to be: Mr. Craig Sager. Oh, and we also plan to talk shit about the NBA too.

Why Sager? Craig is a beacon for the NBA, and his guiding light has helped transform us into the basketball fans we are today. To be blunt, Sager is one of the most underrated names in the game, and most assuredly deserves a lot of credit for the fantastic work he has done for the game.

You really want to know why Sager? Okay, okay. After a Timberwolves playoff victory over the Lakers in 2003, Craig was wearing a bright yellow suit, and Kevin Garnett wasted no time in clowning on the guy. "We don't care what anybody says... we're just like your suit!" It wasn't Sager's mortified look that made us fans for life, it was the reaction of my brother, who laughed so hard from that post-game interview he threw up.

Again, thanks for stopping by, and as a reward for being such good sports, here's a video of a drunk Craig Sager about to down a Jaeger bomb with a bachelor party at [Dan] Majerle's Sports Grill in Phoenix. We're most impressed by Sager not because he's not wearing something ridiculous like a Hawaiian-themed suit, but that he renames the aforementioned drink "Sager bombs."

May the spirit of Craig Sager's Suits be with you.